Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
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