I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
