Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
