Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Randomize
