so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Randomize