The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize
