i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I have demons in me.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
im having a threesome with these popsicles
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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