He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
