tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Randomize
