ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
