your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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