We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
