The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Randomize
