i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
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