if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
