One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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