Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
