We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
