how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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