i permit you to call me
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
