Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
