I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
