Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
