i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize
