Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
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