So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
Randomize
