I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
