Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
Randomize
