BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
