I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
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