They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
