Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
