Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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