My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize
