chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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