Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
