Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
