The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Randomize
