he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
