does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
