No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
