Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
