I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
operation have a gay friend backfired
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
