Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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