Pass out mid-funnel last night.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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