Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
