I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize