Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
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