oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
When did angry sex become our thing?
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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