I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
