Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
